A Walk Along the Veil

October 21, 2015October 21, 2015 / The Zen Witch / Leave a comment

Yesterday we drove into the city for our annual Samhain visit to Lone Fir Cemetery. As always it was an afternoon well spent in contemplation within stillness and beauty. It’s a peaceful soul sanctuary with rustlings and stirrings within the trees and energy amongst the ground. It’s a special, sacred place listed on the National Register for Historic Places and has been recognized as one of the top 10 cemeteries in the world. The first burial was in 1846 and the beautiful grounds holds 25,000 burials spread over more than 30 acres.

Sometimes when I am alone in the city I will stop and wander along the walking paths, occasionally passing someone walking their dog and exchange a smile or polite hello. But sometimes I encounter no one at all. No matter what time of year, it is exquisitely beautiful and yesterday was no exception. In fact we arrived at the perfect time of day on a late autumn afternoon. The mist gathered as my children tip-toed delicately through the rows of headstones and quietly meandered through mounds of leaves beneath giant trees. From time to time they would pause and bend down to gently clear fallen autumn leaves and branches from grave markers.

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While looking at the different graves we discovered many dating back to the mid 1800’s and early 1900’s and pondered what it must have been like back in that time. It was an opportunity to deeply reflect on what dying really means to us and was a thought provoking reminder of the Circle of Life and its place and purpose in all things. Each year that passes the more inquisitive their minds grow as they become more and more aware of a world that exists outside themselves.

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And that is a beautiful thing.

As our sojourn came to a close we each chose a grave to leave a flower next to. I thought their choices were particularly interesting this time. My daughter kept gravitating towards a WWII veteran and my son kept circling back to a little row dotted with the graves of four children whose deaths were from 1901-1903. I suspect influenza although not certain because the pandemic wouldn’t officially begin for at least another decade. However, during our visit we found more than a few infant/child/adult markers within the same time frame clustered with their own families. This particular area was a family plot with the parents resting next to their children. On their headstones was engraved that they had finally joined their beloved children, although it would be decades later.

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082

056

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We stayed until the sun left nothing but a faint pink glow on the horizon, blanketing the atmosphere with a serenity that was hard to leave. My children begged to stay but I sternly told them that I wasn’t ready to leave them behind in a cemetery.

What about you? Do you find beauty and comfort within cemeteries? How would you describe your beliefs in birth, death, and rebirth?

Many Blessings on your Journey )O(

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Not able to visit a cemetery? Take a virtual tour and even leave remembrances with virtual flowers. You can search for the graves of friends, family, or even famous people at this free resource called Find A Grave. They have millions of names in their database- http://www.findagrave.com/

It’s a New Moon on Monday (but I’m too tired for a Firedance Through the Night.)

October 13, 2015 / The Zen Witch / Leave a comment

Monday Mornings are a prime example of why I should follow a routine.

I Know This and yet…

We were up until 10:00 last night finishing an All About Me poster and essay for my daughter to turn in to her teacher this morning. If I had only looked through her backpack Friday afternoon I would have come across the assignment much earlier (but at some point my fourth grader needs to take on a little more responsibility, this I know).

Then my husband and I stayed up way too late watching the premiere of The Walking Dead (we all have our guilty pleasures) and I ate way too much ice cream (another one of my guilty pleasures). I know better than to eat ice cream at 11:00 at night… I didn’t sleep well, (surprise surprise!) and had hot flashes all night long. Now I’m wondering if maybe my body was fighting a diabetic coma after all that ice cream. Like I said, I know better.

My husband woke me when he was about to leave for work. I found myself sprawled out on the bed face down and I think I was drooling. This was going to suck. I never sleep on my stomach because it makes the hardware in my back lock up therefore it’s a very unpleasant position to try and get out of. I felt my husband kiss me on the top of my head and heard him leave the house before I could put any words together. Nothing like oversleeping on a Monday Morning to get your blood pumping for the week. Ugh… After spending several minutes trying to flip myself over and then finally stand up, I spent another 5 minutes shaking the kids awake and giving the dog the command to lick their faces and toes. Finally, the grumbling creatures rolled out of bed only to argue about who got to the bathroom first. (I love our old home with all its charm and character but the one bathroom is totally ridiculous!) So I was judge and jury on who tagged the doorway first before I shuffled my way to the kitchen.

I was grateful school picture day was tomorrow….Right? Wait a minute…I double-checked the calendar (like I should have done last night, I know better) and of course it was this morning. I wrote the checks and filled out the forms, (well one of them because the other one got misplaced somehow so I made one on an index card and put it in an envelope with the check).

I heard the school bus come and go while I was brushing my daughter’s hair, trying to figure out how to fix it in a way she wouldn’t complain about. I didn’t have time to make their lunch and shooed them past the lunch menu I had posted on the fridge when they asked what hot lunch was going to be. Monday’s are typically the worst as far as what they consider ‘gross’. I inwardly cringed, but oh well, there’s always a fruit and salad bar and they can drink the milk. I quickly rinsed out their water bottles and filled them while they put on their coats and backpacks. I gave my son cough syrup (yes, he’s sick again) put the dog in the crate, threw a couple of cereal bars at them (they’d be eating breakfast on the way) and drug the two bleary-eyed beasts to the car. It was a very chilly morning and the kids were complaining about how cold it was. I secretly switched on my seat warmer, feeling a twinge of guilt.

The Poster!

I turn off the car because I need the house keys, run in and pull the giant cumbersome poster off the kitchen table. I rush back out to the car but the back corner of the poster gets smashed in the door and tears when I try to yank it free. I’m glad we live out in the sticks because I’m still in my slippers, wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt with an ice cream stain on the front from last night. My hair is pulled back in a headband and I look like I just woke up. Which I suppose is kind of true.

Back in the car my youngest is crying out of frustration because the seat belt was twisted and he couldn’t get it fastened. I snapped at my daughter to help him.
When we pull up to the school I apologize for being a grumpy Momma Monster this morning and ask them to please forgive me. Their sweet, understanding smiles would nourish me all day long.

So I’m back home in a quiet house sipping on some tea, thinking about all of the things I should be doing today. There’s no way I’m going to get it all done, and the big challenge is for me not to try. I have learned from experience that to try and clean the whole house will wipe out an entire week for me because cleaning like a madwoman will only lead to a severe pain flare-up. No thanks.

I’m finished with my tea so I think it’s time to set my intention for the day, even though it’s after 10:00 in the morning. Better late than never I suppose. So I ask myself a simple question; How do I want to feel today? Well, I’d like to feel calm and centered. I want my home to be a place of peace that embraces my loved ones when they return from their long days. How can I bring calm, centered peace to myself and my surroundings?

First things first: Shower and get dressed. I can’t truly function until I take a shower.
Start a load of laundry. If I do one load a day I can easily fold and put it away instead of letting a mountain of clean clothes collect on the couch.
Load dishwasher. The kitchen doesn’t look too bad so this won’t take long at all.
Change sheets. I have been doing this every Monday for years. There’s nothing quite like sliding into bed with clean sheets.
Sweep/vacuum. This is a quick job because I am physically unable to move stuff around. Hubby does the big job on Sundays.

Wow, that feels better! I can now take a moment to calm and center myself so that I can do a Home Blessing Hour. I like doing these on Mondays, but I will admit I have recently skipped a few weeks. It’s pretty obvious that it’s way overdue and I feel that the added chaos in this morning is a direct reflection of that. Besides it’s a New Moon on Monday. Maybe I’ll shake up the lizard mixture…please forgive me for all the Duran Duran references; for some reason I can’t seem to help myself.

My simple way of blessing our home

I have a large stash of clear quartz crystals that are usually in circulation between being used and cleansed. So I gather the “used” crystals and place them in a bowl and set them outside to be cleansed later and wash my hands. I then gather cleansed crystals and place them on the main altar to be placed in each room of the house after the smudging. I anoint white tealight candles with sandalwood, rosemary, and lavender essential oils and place them in holders in each room of the house. I prepare my incense (today I feel like Palo Santo) in my abalone shell and take my eagle feather to distribute the smoke. I surround myself with a protective white light and ask the Universal Divine for guidance and protection from negativity. I then ask for assistance from my Guides and totem animals to bring/lead new powerful light energy into our home. After giving myself a good smudge, I start at what I consider to be the center of my home, which isn’t exactly the physical center but the center of our “Home” and in a clockwise motion swirl the incense up and down each wall, along the baseboards, back up along corners, paying special attention to doorways and windows. As I move through the rooms I say something like “I ask that the breath of light shine brightly in this space and that it neutralizes any negativity. I welcome positive energy, and as I will so mote it be.” I always keep moving and swirling in a clockwise motion. I do this because I am not really “banishing” I am cleansing and welcoming in the light, the brightness of which dispels the accumulated negativity. As each room is completed, I light the white candle and move on to the next room. Some rooms need more smudging than others, and I also spend extra time on my children’s dream catchers. When I have made my rounds, I place a cleansed quartz crystal in each room, although the exact location may change from time to time. I don’t usually plan to run errands on Mondays so I am able to allow the candles to burn down completely.

When our home is cleansed and recharged with positive energy my loved ones will breathe in deeply and sometimes let out a little sigh when they walk through the door. It is a touching moment that makes my insides glow. This House Blessing will make tonight the perfect night to set up our Samhain altar and some of our favorite decorations throughout the house. I’m glad I waited.

I think tonight should be a caramel corn night!

This recipe is a bit time consuming, but well worth the wait!

Caramel Corn Recipe

Ingredients
7 quarts plain popped popcorn
2 cups dry roasted peanuts (optional)
2 cups brown sugar
1/2 cup light corn syrup

1 teaspoon salt
1 cup margarine
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
Directions
Place the popped popcorn into two shallow greased baking pans. You may use roasting pans, jelly roll pans, or disposable roasting pans. Add the peanuts to the popped corn if using. Set aside.
Preheat the oven to 250 degrees F (120 degrees C). Combine the brown sugar, corn syrup, margarine and salt in a saucepan. Bring to a boil over medium heat, stirring enough to blend. Once the mixture begins to boil, boil for 5 minutes while stirring constantly.
Remove from the heat, and stir in the baking soda and vanilla. The mixture will be light and foamy. Immediately pour over the popcorn in the pans, and stir to coat. Don’t worry too much at this point about getting all of the corn coated.
Bake for 1 hour, removing the pans, and giving them each a good stir every 15 minutes. Line the counter top with waxed paper. Dump the corn out onto the waxed paper and separate the pieces. Allow to cool completely, then store in airtight containers or resealable bags. Enjoy!

What are some of the ways you bless your home?

Many Blessings on Your Journey )O(

In the Spirit of Collage (Pt. 2)

October 3, 2015October 3, 2015 / The Zen Witch / Leave a comment

The Wisdom of the Womb

It would be nearly two decades before I would have the yearning to put together another collage and it came about while on bed rest when I was pregnant with my fourth child. I couldn’t seem to get jazzed about scrapbooking like some of my friends did. I found that there was way too much stuff to deal with and lug around, and strangely, I thought it seemed too structured (if that makes any sense). But I needed something to do.

So out of the blue I began gathering photos with pagan people/places/themes from old calendars, greeting cards, and torn from alternative magazines. These were added to the collection of pictures I had in a folder and stored over the years (for what exactly, I did not know, until that time of course). During the sorting process I recalled there being a large empty frame in the corner of the garage and asked my husband to bring it inside for me. Using the cardboard backing as the base for the collage, I went crazy on it. For the next several weeks I spent hours sorting through and cutting out pictures. I came across small trinkets like snakeskin found on the garden path, sand in the bottom of a bucket from a beach trip earlier in the year, an old spiderweb my toddler brought to me, unrefined sea salt, colorful beads, and other odds and ends to be used as embellishments. I found myself immersed in a therapeutic activity without ever consciously saying to myself, “gee, I’m making a collage”, I just did it and it helped those last five weeks go by a little bit faster. More importantly, it just felt good, like a balm for my soul.

My “downtime collage” has now presided over my main altar as a backdrop for nearly six years and continues to inspire me in countless ways.

Pieces of Parenting: Sharing the Wisdom

After taking all the precautions and strict bed rest, our last child was born at 32 weeks. My placenta had ruptured and at one point during the c-section, the outlook was dim for the two of us. What little I can remember of the things I saw, felt, and heard during that perilous time remains as ethereal wisps of fear that brush against my subconscious from time to time. To look at him today, no one would ever suspect he was born a preemie struggling on a ventilator in the NICU. Other than his mild asthma, his looks and build replicate his Poppa’s, who is a hefty ex-lineman football player. Needless to say, he is walking in his dad’s footsteps as the offensive lineman on the 3rd grade football team.

I feel blessed to experience life with my family. Our children are our biggest accomplishments, cherished little souls that we wistfully watch grow and mature into adults faster than we ever thought possible. Our oldest son (their older brother by 10+ years) recently left for college, so now it’s now just the four of us in the household (plus our familiars of course). It has taken some time to adjust, but we’re getting there, knowing that through love and acceptance we can weave any gaps left in our newly downsized household.

Collage as a Family Group Activity

My children love collage and have enjoyed making some of their own creations over the years. From there the idea to construct a big family collage to honor the Four Directions was born.

There Were 5 Rules:

To find images that they felt represented the four directions
Group them accordingly
Cut only paper
No glue fights
Have Fun!

Though we live in the mundane world out of necessity, as a family we bring in as much magick as we can, tapping into the other realms through practice, patience, guidance and protection. What better time to create something together as a new start (and finally new bedrooms of their own to boot!); something that we each contribute to, sharing how we feel about our world at the moment and linking our emotions together in a visual way. What better way than a collage!

We could have used personal family photos for this project, but to truly tap into something deeper, something on the archetypal plane, we needed universal symbols, those things that spoke to us on several different levels. So we took the time and sifted through old stuffed folders of scraps torn or cut from magazines, catalogs, calendars, brochures, and whatever else we found, gathering new images as well. The process becomes a wonderful unifying experience, bringing intimate understanding between those involved.

An example that comes to mind is one child may set a photo of a bear on the table to be used in the direction of North. When explaining that they see the bear as a representation of Earth, it will in turn will resonate with the rest of us in some way by suggestion, personal affinity or connection, knowledge of the animal, etc.. If you were to ask us individually ‘why’ we see it as connected to North/Earth, you will more than likely receive different answers from each of us. Strength, courage, grounding, confidence, beauty, and so forth. Each answer blends harmoniously and the back of the bear image is coated with glue by one child and placed by the other, smoothed by me, and acknowledged by my husband. This creates teamwork and connection in a loving gift of sharing and mutual understanding.

Creating a family collage can be a powerful spiritual experience.

Gathering images and sharing ideas

The finished product hangs happily on a wall in my Tarot office/art and craft studio/ritual space/massage table area/yoga room/library and reading place/writing space/eBay store and where we do many of our family rituals because obviously everything we need is right there!

We did a decent job on trying to keep the elements in their quarters; Earth has furry animals and outdoorsy activities. South has the sun, candles, and a cool dragon. East has outer-space, sky, clouds, pictures of people feeling inspired, dreaming, and singing. West is filled with watery things including Momma’s totem, the seahorse. That was a fun surprise because one of the kids snuck it on at the last minute. It makes everyone who sees it happy with the light, friendly, childlike, magickal imagery. It offers us all something we could use a little bit more of.

Many Blessings on Your Journey )O(

Forgive the Pain

September 14, 2015September 14, 2015 / The Zen Witch / Leave a comment

Guilt. It’s a nasty word that seeps deep into the pores of even the most thick-skinned of people. I can personally say, without a doubt, that my biggest guilt issues have occurred since becoming a parent.

I know that I have blogged here and there about guilt; little snippets of should’ve, would’ve, could’ves in my parenting strategies, coping skills, chronic pain, depression, and all the rest of the ugly mix-matched and beat up baggage I have acquired over the years.

Ugh.

I pressed a new page down in my journal today, but not before reading my previous entry from the week before. This entry compels me to readdress guilt and particularly the release of it during this New Moon.

Below is my journal entry from Monday September 7, 2015:

I sit here in bed, propped up by pillows, trying to write as much as I can before my muscle relaxers and oxycodone set in. Need I mention it’s been a horribly painful day? Again? The aches, the burning, the locking up of the hardware in my back…none of that compares to the agonizing feelings I have over the loss of my children when they return to school tomorrow. Another summer has come and gone and it’s time for them to enter a new grade.

Please Universe, I’m pumping the brakes as hard and fast as I can, but it only seems to cause the opposite effect.

I’m so pathetically sad and tearful as I look back over this past summer and all the things I wish we could have done. Oh how I hate writing through the blur of tears! There’s so much guilt over spending afternoons in bed when I should have been teaching my daughter more about the Tarot or encouraging my son to look more closely at bugs. Summer is now over and what have I got to show for it?

Memories…yes I know there are the memories…and photos of course…but…

I’m afraid of all the time wasted and opportunities lost. Things my chronic pain takes from me. From Us.

And it pisses me off!

After reading that entry I thought long and hard about that day, remembering very well how I felt both physically and emotionally. I was a total wreck. Unlike that awful day, today has been good to me. I feel functional, happy, productive and my pain level is manageable.

But the words that kept playing in my mind over and over again were, “I’m afraid of all the time wasted and opportunities lost.” By typing those words right now I find I have to fight back the feelings of sadness and guilt. As today went by I paid close attention to each time those words and feelings sprung up. When they did I would gently remind myself that there’s absolutely no proof that my children are suffering or living in constant disappointment. There’s also no evidence that they feel unloved or ignored. I know this in my heart of hearts because I do the best I can with what I’ve got to give on any certain day. Every choice I make for my children I make with love.

What we do is what we can do, and there have been many days where my children will climb into bed with me and we will watch cartoons, read silently, talk, laugh, discuss spirituality or even play cards. Those may be the bad pain days, but the day itself remains positive, supported by love.

When I reflect on this past summer it becomes clear that some of our best moments were the quiet ones. It didn’t matter how often we traveled, how many things we went to, or even how much money we spent, all we really wanted was to be content; to just ‘be’. Sometimes that included travel and money, but it didn’t have to. Enjoyment came from lots of different things, and I am now beginning to question my feelings of guilt caused by my fear of what we weren’t able to experience together as a family.

So to put it into perspective I’m going to start typing out everything that pops into my head that we did this past summer, and I’ll stop when I begin to slow down. So here goes…

We went camping, spent a week at the beach, took several long nature walks, went fishing, horseback riding, out for dinner at our favorite pizza place, then a fancy restaurant, and a greasy diner. We did a picnic lunch in the backyard, and even celebrated several birthdays.

We stayed up way too late to watch the stars and satellites move across the night sky, took time doing a family collage, baked all kinds of delicious awful-for-you goodies, had a lemonade stand, colored with crayons, painted with water colors, walked underneath a giant waterfall and had a “Fairy Tea” in the garden.

We researched animals that interested us then talked about what we learned. We played board games, went to the movies and watched movies at home. We did hilarious shadow puppets on the ceiling before bed, read lots and lots of books together quietly and to each other. We roasted marshmallows and told ghost stories during the backyard bonfire. We harvested herbs, had a puppet show, and spent countless hours on our fairy garden.

Oh, and we swam. A lot!

So when I look back on this past summer I can quickly and easily tick off many of our adventures. Some required travel, and some had to be rescheduled several times due to my health. Some cost money, but a lot of them didn’t.

I can say with conviction and honesty that all in all we did what we had set out to do this summer, even if sometimes things had to be modified. I would even go so far as to say that we had a successful summer with moments of fun, travel, and loads of laughter. What matters most was the time we were able to spend together. It’s okay that I wasn’t always on my A-game especially on those painful days that were spent mostly in bed. It’s okay that I felt the need to sleep or not up for company. It’s time to release the guilt about all of that.

What touches my heart the most is my husband and children’s natural compassion and understanding. Were there times of disappointment? You betcha. But the good definitely outweighed the bad, and maybe I shouldn’t say ‘good’ or ‘‘bad’ because no one else in my family would describe those times as such. So let me rephrase that, we did more things together than we did apart, we smiled more than frowned, we enjoyed more than we lacked, and we most definitely loved the whole time.

It’s more than time to release the guilt and I think I’m finally ready and capable of doing so because I’m ready to forgive the pain. It’s time to forgive the pain. That statement might not make sense to some, it’s even a bit foreign to me. But right here, right now, as I come to the end of this blog post, in this quiet moment of writing and solitude, those words made themselves to my fingertips, where i pressed the keys and then shared them with you. I ask that you please read those words again and allow your heart to lead them to the right place and that you freely accept what they mean to you.

Let this New Moon be a time of releasing guilt and/or shame for the things you had no control over. Let go and freely forgive yourself, in all the ways, in Perfect Love and Perfect Trust.

Many Blessings on your Journey )O(

Circling the Hearth

August 27, 2015August 27, 2015 / The Zen Witch / 2 Comments

I remember when I used to give my little ones stacks of pots and pans with cooking utensils to bang on them with. Nothing like a 15 month-old toying around with an improvised set of drums. At around 2 they got their first can of Play Doh. My kids still love Play Doh. Hell, I still love Play Doh. It’s wondrous how children love to imitate us and how we as grown-ups love to imitate them. I mean, who doesn’t like to make mud pies of either the earthly or culinary kind?

Cooking to me is an experience of bringing to life individuality, concentration, ingenuity, patience, and resourcefulness, just to name a few. Young or old, creative or meticulous, adventurous or cautious, cooking has it all, and sometimes all at once. The all at once thing is probably one of the reasons children love to cook and why I want to let them. However, I have yet to master the patience of allowing my kids to take over in the kitchen and it may be a long time before I leave the sidelines. Cooking takes preparation, it’s time consuming, mess making, and most times a big ordeal.

Meet Endora Endive. She resides on our kitchen shelf overseeing the Wiccan Kitchen.

My lack of patience combined with fear for my children’s safety makes it mandatory for this Witch to take a big breath of Zen before handing over an apron; both the apron and deep breath are imperative before teaching a little one how to crack an egg. Of course it took me some time to learn this.

My youngest daughter is the child who has always loved to help me in the kitchen. I’ll admit I’m still freakishly afraid of letting her handle raw chicken but I’ve gotten much better about most things….well, except sharp knives, cheese graters, can openers, and even those dumb little tubes of refrigerated crescent rolls. I’m telling you, I’ve cut myself on everyone one of those things (yes, even the crescent roll tube) and I, like those who regularly cook, have plenty of scars to prove it. Of course every time I can think of, those slices and nics happened when I was in a mad rush to complete dinner. Someday I suppose I’ll learn my lesson.

One of my parental milestones was accomplished when I finally let her take over the pan on the burner without cringing in fear that she would burn herself or create a disaster of monstrous proportions. Loosening my grip on controlling the kitchen has been hard, especially when I step back and watch those little mistakes happen so that she can learn from them. In the end, her bright smile of pride is all I need to dispel my fears (within reason of course).

Here’s a few of our favorite (easy) Mabon recipes. Enjoy!

Spicy Mabon Punch

Serves 8

INGREDIENTS:

1 orange
4 whole cloves
3 cups apple juice
1 cinnamon stick
1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
3 tablespoons honey
1 tablespoon lemon juice
2 1/4 cups pineapple juice

DIRECTIONS:

1.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Stud the whole oranges with cloves, and bake for 30 minutes.
2.
In a large saucepan, combine the apple juice and cinnamon stick. Bring to a boil, reduce heat to medium, and simmer 5 minutes. Remove from heat, and stir in the nutmeg, honey, lemon juice, and pineapple juice. Can be placed in a slow cooker on low heat with clove-studded oranges floating on top.

Autumn Apple Salad

Serves 8

INGREDIENTS:
8 tart green apples, cored and chopped
1/2 cup blanched slivered almonds,
toasted
1/2 cup dried cranberries
1/2 cup chopped dried cherries
2 (8 ounce) container vanilla yogurt

DIRECTIONS:

1.
In a medium bowl, stir together the apples, almonds, cranberries, cherries and yogurt until evenly coated. Serve Immediately

Yellow Squash Casserole

Be creative and use different types of squash if you wish.

Serves 8

INGREDIENTS:

4 cups sliced yellow squash
1/2 cup chopped onion
36 buttery round crackers, crushed
1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese
2 eggs, beaten
3/4 cup milk
1/4 cup butter, melted
1 teaspoon salt
ground black pepper to taste
2 tablespoons butter

DIRECTIONS:

1.
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C).
2.
Place squash and onion in a large skillet over medium heat. Pour in a small amount of water. Cover, and cook until squash is tender, about 5 minutes. Drain well, and place in a large bowl.
3.
In a medium bowl, mix together cracker crumbs and cheese. Stir half of the cracker mixture into the cooked squash and onions. In a small bowl, mix together eggs and milk, then add to squash mixture. Stir in 1/4 cup melted butter, and season with salt and pepper. Spread into a 9×13 inch baking dish. Sprinkle with remaining cracker mixture, and dot with 2 tablespoons butter.
4.
Bake in preheated oven for 25 minutes, or until lightly browned.

Autumn Beef Stew

Serves 8-10

INGREDIENTS:

2 pounds cubed beef stew meat
3 tablespoons olive oil
4 cups beef broth
1 teaspoon dried rosemary
2 tablespoons dried parsley
1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
3 large potatoes, peeled and cubed
4 carrots, cut into 1 inch pieces
4 stalks celery, cut into 1 inch pieces
1 large onion, chopped
2 teaspoons cornstarch
2 teaspoons cold water

DIRECTIONS:

1.
In a large pot or dutch oven, cook beef in oil over medium heat until brown. Dissolve bouillon in water and pour into pot. Stir in rosemary, parsley and pepper. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat, cover and simmer 1 hour.
2.
Stir potatoes, carrots, celery, and onion into the pot. Dissolve cornstarch in 2 teaspoons cold water and stir into stew. Cover and simmer 1 hour more.

Mabon Cornbread

Serve with butter and honey if you wish

Serves 8

INGREDIENTS:

1/2 cup butter
2/3 cup white sugar
2 eggs
1 cup buttermilk
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 cup cornmeal
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon salt

DIRECTIONS:

1.
Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease an 8 inch square pan.
2.
Melt butter in large skillet. Remove from heat and stir in sugar. Quickly add eggs and beat until well blended. Combine buttermilk with baking soda and stir into mixture in pan. Stir in cornmeal, flour, and salt until well blended and few lumps remain. Pour batter into the prepared pan.
3.
Bake in the preheated oven for 30 to 40 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.

Rustic Fruit Tart

1/2 cup butter, chilled
1/2 cup cream cheese
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 apples – peeled, cored, and thinly sliced
1 pear – peeled, cored and sliced
1/4 cup orange juice
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon ground cardamom
1 1/2 tablespoons cornstarch
1/2 cup apricot jam, warmed

DIRECTIONS:

1.
Cut the cold butter and cream cheese into the flour with a knife or pastry blender until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. (This can also be done in a food processor: pulse the cold butter into the flour until the mixture resembles cornmeal; add the cream cheese and pulse until it’s the size of small peas.) When you squeeze a handful of the mixture, it should form a ball. Shape the dough into a round disk, wrap it in plastic, and refrigerate for at least 1 hour.
2.
Toss the sliced apples and pear with the orange juice. Whisk together the brown sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, cardamom, and cornstarch. Toss the fruit with the sugar-spice mixture and set aside.
3.
Preheat an oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). Set out an 8-inch tart pan, or, if you’ll be making a free-form tart (galette), lightly grease a baking sheet.
4.
Roll the pastry out on a lightly floured work surface to form a 10-inch circle. Transfer the dough to the tart pan or baking sheet. Arrange the fruit decoratively in the tart pastry. If you’re baking the tart on a baking sheet, leave a 2-inch rim of dough and fold it up over the edge of the fruit (the pastry folds will overlap).
5.
Bake the tart in the preheated oven until the crust is browned and the filling is bubbly, about 30 minutes. Remove the tart from the oven and brush it with the apricot jam.

Many Blessings on Your Journey )O(

Bountiful Tides; A Lesson in the Blessings of Spontaneity

August 9, 2015August 11, 2015 / The Zen Witch / 2 Comments

This past Lammas family celebration happened several days later than actual “Lammas” because I was away priestessing the prior weekend. So this year’s Lammas was celebrated during our annual trip to the beach. I battled the perfectionist in me and just went with it. Nothing fancy, nothing planned, no props, just an impromptu altar carved into the sand by the kids followed by many spontaneous blessings to (and from) Earth, Land, Sky, and of course, Sea. Uncomplicated, unexpected, and perfectly imperfect.

August at the Oregon Coast is the best chance for seeing sunshine & warm (mid 60’s-70’s) weather days. I’ll admit I love the gray, drizzly, foggy days the best (you know, like any minute you’ll catch a glimpse of a ghost ship on the horizon) but I have no problem sacrificing the mood mist in exchange for watching the kids splash in the cold water without their lips turning blue.

When I break down the weekend, I see the bountiful gifts Lammas had given to us in exchange for nothing more than our awareness and acknowledgement of the ebbing flow of Earth’s yearly cyclical tide.

We enjoyed amazing cracked black pepper and sea salt sourdough wheat bread served before our main meal at our favorite restaurant. Breaking the bead, we each handed the other a piece with a blessing of, “may you never go hungry and may you always be nourished.”

We took joy in wandering around the tide pools and even explored a few secluded beaches we happened upon. We lit a beach bonfire and toasted marshmallows, huddling together in our sweatshirts as we watched the sunset.

We watched in awe as the bats swooped through the darkened night sky, taking advantage of the abundance of bugs; a lesson in harvest indeed! It was a wonderful opportunity to talk about the blessings the Goddess gives in all things. We took time to talk about the cycles, how Summer will soon be winding down, and our thoughts and feelings about it.

We visited a glassblowing gallery, becoming completely absorbed in the artist’s craftsmanship and technique of creating something so beautiful out of a molten blob of glass. The connection to Lugh, The Shining One, was not lost on us.

We spent the better part of an afternoon switching between napping drowsily on the warm sand to gazing upon the amazing colorful kites as they danced in the Pacific coastal wind.

It’s a true delight to look back on the last few days and see how we were touched by the hand of the Goddess and God. For me, it’s a reminder of how the spontaneity of Pagan Parenting blesses our lives in many untold ways. It fills our hearts, minds and souls with experiences in mindfulness which are difficult to describe. It’s about letting our instinctive and intuitive connection to the world around us be our guide by simply being aware of what is happening in the present moment and embracing its gifts.

Many blessings on your Journey )O(

The Real Me, The Real You

May 22, 2015May 22, 2015 / The Zen Witch / 2 Comments

My True Self

It’s strange to think about all the roles I have played in my life. I was a daughter, then eventually an adopted daughter, only child, competitive figure skater, good little Catholic girl, a Duranie, rebellious teenage runaway, juvenile delinquent, friend, lover, teen mom, college student, wife, heart-breaker, teacher, occult student, Tarot reader, Priestess, & one who lives with chronic pain. These are just a few off the top of my head. Now obviously there are some roles I am not proud of and there are those that make me happy inside. Each one of those roles has been a unique learning experience and has led my life in many different directions. Two of those things I have been for more than half my life; and those two things are a wife and mom.

The role of a wife and mom are are what most people identify me as, because they are the two roles I show most to the world. They are big pieces of my life, and I love being those things. My journey as a wife and mom has given me some of my most beautiful and amazing memories and I know there are good things to come (even through the muddy waters of problem children). The roles of wife and mom are pieces of my life but they don’t define me. These roles are what they are; roles. The real me, (the real you, the real them) is infinite and immeasurable. Everyone is their own being with a unique spirit and a spark of the divine, and yet I can sometimes bog myself down with labels. Do you do that too? Yes, I’m married, I have children, I’m a pet owner, volunteer, and homemaker. I have many interests and hobbies. I am blessed with those things and those are a part of my being, but not the totality of me.

Why do we limit ourselves with our self-image? Why do we habitually identify our uniqueness with roles and titles, employment and status, what we own or what we don’t own, our personality traits and our looks? It’s self-limiting, and I don’t believe that’s the entire reason for this incarnation and most definitely not my soul’s existence. There’s so much more to me. It was time to knock down those walls I’d made. It was time to expand my sense of self and open myself up to new opportunities. There was room needed for my new dreams and ideas to flourish.

So, who am I?

In learning to know myself, I have had to become more aware during times of meditation, journaling, and when reading the Tarot for myself. From time to time I pause and ask myself if I am keeping to certain roles during this time of introspection, or am I floating free of those labels? Am I looking at the whole picture of me? This has helped me tremendously in letting go. I was surprised at first when I felt more complete the more I let go. Now it comes naturally when I’m in my quiet time and space of solitude. It has become an immeasurably important piece of my life, allowing me to step back in order see the strength and beauty of who I was, who I am, and the woman I aspire to be.

Blessings on your Journey )O(

Create Garden Goddesses

May 13, 2015May 13, 2015 / The Zen Witch / 2 Comments

My kids and I got Craft Happy and made some cute little Garden Goddesses to grace our little Fairy Village currently under construction beneath the holly bush/tree. I grabbed some small clay pots, I thought they’d be a sturdy base, and turned them over creating the ‘skirt’ if you will. The bodies were made with another tiny clay pot turned upside down secured in place with a small wooden dowel through both drainage holes and then secured with help of a glue gun. Actually the entire project incorporated the use of a glue gun. I bought my kids a low heat glue gun and I use my regular one. The kiddos still need to be extra careful because hot glue can blister little fingertips.

The upside down clay pot for a sturdy base and shape for the ‘skirt’.

I also grabbed my Craft Crap Box that has you-name-it inside and found plenty of fabric scraps, including tulle (didn’t even know I had that) and muslin, different types of craft moss, flower embellishments, seashells, straw, twine, feathers, etc. We also went outside and gathered twigs and other interesting items, and then we were set.

We each had full reign of our individual Garden Goddess, designing and constructing them with our own vision. Not surprisingly, each of the Garden Goddesses came out very different from one another, and were as unique as we each are. When we were finished, we named our Goddess and told a little bit about her personality and purpose.

I made mine as an Earth Garden Goddess to bring magick to the soil and to nurture seedlings, roots, trees, and everything in-between. She will bring blossoming energy to help create a perfect environment for our Fairy Village, enticing the Fairy Folk to come and occupy the garden. As an Earth Garden Goddess, she will give protection to all creatures big and small, blessing our Fairy Village with stability and abundance.

My 9 year-old daughter’s Garden Goddess is named the Whispering Willow Goddess. She will bring song, laughter and joy to our Fairy Village. She plays the flute and sings in harmony with the fairy folk, and if your heart is open, then you too can hear the merriment. Her voice whispers on the wind, and her giggles land softly on the outdoor wind chimes. Her happiness and mirth is the dandelion fluff that floats through the air on a warm sunny day breeze. She brings whimsical happiness to our Fairy Village.

My 7 year-old son’s Garden Goddess is The Seashell Goddess, who has come to help the fairy Village stay green and happy by bringing rain from the sea. The life giving water is essential for the survival of the Fairy Village and the woodland and creatures all around. As a Shell Goddess, she is deeply connected to ocean waves and the pull of the moon. She reminds us to look at the sky on the night of the Full Moon and admire her beautiful glow, which will also light up the Fairy Village for their Full Moon Dance!

I do hope you try these cute Garden Goddesses with your children. We can’t wait to place them in the garden to watch over our new Fairy Village beneath the holly tree.

Many Blessings on Your Journey )O(

Honoring Our Mother in all Her Forms

May 9, 2015May 9, 2015 / The Zen Witch / Leave a comment

As an eclectic pagan family we celebrate Mother’s Day as a day to respect and honor the our Mother, both cosmic and human, whether biological, kinship group, or fostered. Our mother figure is the one who nurtured us, loved us unconditionally, and with whom we are bonded to. It’s also a day to give honor to the Divine Feminine, the quintessential mother archetype.

Many customs, traditions, holidays, and observances can be traced back to their pagan roots. We live closely connected to the cycles of the seasons and the ebb and flow of the moon cycle, but we also choose to embrace other age-old holidays and traditions of the world as well. It’s our way of teaching our children to understand society’s connection to the ancient ways and to gain knowledge about how customs and traditions evolve over time, just as societies have continued to do.

With Mother’s day tomorrow, we as a family have been discussion the origins of the Great Earth-Mother and her importance throughout history. The sacred feminine is a powerful influence in human history, as Mother-Earth worship was around long before the recent patriarchal society which began around 3,000 BC. Evidence of the powerful feminine influence and importance weaves itself through the patterns of ancient matriarchal societies (a small handful still exist in the world today).

Mother-Earth worship and reverence for the Feminine Divine has been found as far back as the Paleolithic period. The Venus of Willendorf sculpture, one of the most well-known figurines representing the Sacred Feminine, is estimated to have been carved between 30,000-22,000 BCE. When I look at her I am in awe of the sheer power of her female body. For me, there is no doubt that she encompasses the magick of the sacred feminine as a symbol of fertility, abundance, strength and stability. She is the embodiment of motherhood and (although some would disagree) beauty.

Even long before the Venus of Willendorf was created, there is evidence of Feminine Divine worship. It has been discovered to exist throughout time and that ancient cultures around the world share its characteristics. These discoveries have been dated as far back as 2.5 million years ago up until the introduction of agriculture around 10,000 BCE. This time-span covers the greatest portion of humanity’s time on Earth, proving how powerful their dedication and reverence for the sacred feminine and the Mother archetype was. They understood the enduring connection of the divine love between a mother and her child.

There is something beautiful, remarkable, and inexplicable to others when trying to describe the love I have for my children. Yet, the intimate bond that mothers share with their child has existed throughout time and throughout the world. Once bonded with their child, the connection between mother and child is said to be one of the strongest connections in nature. I remember holding my firstborn child for the very first time just as much as my second, third, and fourth. For me there were no favorites, just an immeasurable quantity of love. It’s a powerful emotion when you love your child, and the experience brings much laughter and joy. However, the same power of that emotion can just as easily make you weep with tears. It’s a relationship that is as demanding as it is rewarding, and as humbling as it is cherished.

My children are now 24, 18, 9, and 7 and I can honestly say that It didn’t matter how many temper tantrums, adolescent woes, and disagreements there were, my love stayed true. I somehow knew the bond was meant to shift and change as each child grew more independent, becoming the person they were meant to be. Even as they begin to reach adulthood, the strength of that bond never fades.

It is difficult for me to step back and allow them to make what I feel are really bad decisions, like having relationships with people I disapprove of, or deciding not to go to college. It breaks my heart and hurts my soul that my oldest is a heroin addict, but she is still my child.

My empathy has grown through my experiences raising children and when I look out at the world, I cannot fathom the heartache the Great-Mother must be feeling. But She remains steadfast, and She is ever-present with a watchful eye, unwavering in Her unconditional love. Like me, she hopes for the best. I admire her enduring strength and compassion and I honor her by following her lead, aspiring to be the best mom I can be.

I’ve overheard excited whispers throughout this past week as they plan a special treat for me on the morning of Mother’s Day. I am overwhelmed with joy at their excitement and whether they bring me breakfast in bed or spray me with silly string, I will join in with their laughter, and relish the bounce as they jump into bed with me.

I will also appreciate and cherish the effort made from my older children by way of cards, small gifts, or just doing something nice for me (I desperately need my car washed). I hope for a phone call from my oldest. No matter what I receive/don’t receive, I will give special thanks for the opportunity to be a mother to these special beings of light in my life.

My way of honoring my mom will be letting her know how thankful and appreciative I am for all that she has given me. I want to thank her for adopting me, giving me a home and family. For sharing the joy in my accomplishments as well as for putting up with my rebellious teenage years. I am going to let her know how important she is is to me by taking her out for coffee and piece of pie, then off to her favorite nursery to let her choose some flowers for her garden (and I may find something for myself as well), It’s a time and place set aside just for us, to appreciate the loving energy we share for one another.

Is she the perfect mother? No. Am I the perfect daughter? Oh Hell No! Am I a perfect mom? I’ll admit that I am not, but I sure try my best. It’s those imperfections that make us human and remind us that one of the greatest lessons in life is to learn compassion and to love without judgement. And what a beautiful feeling it is when you feel that unconditional love in return.

Who is the Mother-Figure in your life? How are you planning to honor her? If you yourself are a mother, how are you planning on honoring yourself?

Many Blessings on your Journey )O(

Beautiful Beltane Blessings

May 3, 2015May 8, 2015 / The Zen Witch / Leave a comment

Hearts Awaken, Fairies Afoot

Beltane is on or about the halfway mark between Spring Equinox and the Summer Solstice so here in the Pacific Northwest the weather usually becomes milder and the daylight noticeably stretches further and further into the evening hours.Thursday, April 30, May Eve, was when Mercury entered Gemini, remaining there until the beginning part of June. This is a time to feel inspired to travel and learn, maybe even take on a new class or venture out to a new destination. With Mercury in Gemini I need to remember one key element for a continuing successful Beltane weekend. Communication. I’ll need an open mind and to embrace spontaneity to bring Beltane Blessings into the hearts and lives of my loved ones, and to effectively extend the loving energy flow to our Mother Earth who so desperately needs it.

On Friday my children and I gathered moss, fallen twigs and bark and created a fun little fairy playground to place under our giant holly bush. We made a little gazebo complete with a swing, and a giant slide with ladder. A welcome sign pulls it all together. We have planned to continue making things for the fairy folk throughout the summer. This morning we are finishing up a house and the kids are really involved. Who am I kidding? I think I’m just as much (if not more) into it than my children are!

Last night my husband and I had a quiet evening at home for our private Beltane observance so I cooked up some sensual pleasures to share with my him to honor our union of Mind, Body, and Spirit. Our ritual was wonderful, beginning with a massage and went on from there. *wink*